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:iconsenatortano:
So far vvery well written, But I do suggest using other terms. I saw "spider-man" alot leaving less of an impact on me. May i suggest using another term like "webbed hero" or "Masked Bandet (sp)" The word choices were weak in some points of the example. Maybe looking up some more powerful or less systematic words will do that trick! I know this will be a great fan fiction to read! I will admit writing stories about things you don't know much about can be hard- but I know you can do this!

Other then that i think its great!
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:icongwencandrawzat:
GwenCanDrawZat Nov 25, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I think it's the style of the prologue, Mathew Stover is an amazing author and I've decided to use that style a bit.
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:iconsenatortano:
SenatorTano Nov 25, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
oh if its another authors style- then go for it- C:
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:icongwencandrawzat:
GwenCanDrawZat Nov 25, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Yep! I get that a lot when it comes to "I'm not a fan of this, but it's their style." :) Reason I used the full name Nick Furry so many times. :XD: Instead of something else.
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:iconsenatortano:
SenatorTano Nov 26, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
oh I see- I got my Style from Gillian Shields and Alexandra Adornetto
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:icongwencandrawzat:
GwenCanDrawZat Nov 26, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
It really depends on where I'm writing. I like to write in first person, but I don't know the characters well enough. I like going with my own styles, but it's good to try something new.
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:iconsenatortano:
SenatorTano Nov 26, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
true c:
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